Monday, March 10, 2014


PUNOGRAPHY

· I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
· When chemists die, they barium.
· Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
· A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
· I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
· How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
· I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
· This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
· I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
· I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words .
 · They told me I had type A blood, but it was a type-O.
· This dyslexic man walks into a bra .
· PMS jokes aren't funny, period.


I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
· A cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
· When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
· What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds..
· I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
· Broken pencils are pointless.
· What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
· England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .
· I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
· I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
· All the toilets in London police stations have been stolen.    Police say they have nothing to go on.
· I took the job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
· Velcro - what a rip off!
 · Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy


4 comments:

  1. How is a dog like a phone? It has collar ID.

    Why was the cat afraid of the tree?
    Because of the bark.

    What was Bruce Lee's favorite beverage?
    WHA-TAH!

    tmw

    ReplyDelete
  2. Aha!

    I see that The Merry Widow was here!

    I wonder how she found out about this blog post. **wink**

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm not telling..."smirk"

    tmw

    ReplyDelete
  4. Well, glad you both stopped by to have a little fun. We get more serious again tomorrow.

    You never know what t expect here. I don't often know, myself, until I find a topic, which often happens in unexpected ways.

    Thank Heaven for friends who send emails! ;-)

    ReplyDelete

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